Hong Kong News

Nonpartisan, Noncommercial, unconstrained.
Saturday, Apr 01, 2023

Your child has almost certainly watched porn – here’s how to talk to them about it

Your child has almost certainly watched porn – here’s how to talk to them about it

If you think your children haven’t watched pornography, I’m sorry, but you may have to think again. Earlier this week, the Children’s Commissioner for England released research which shows young people are accessing pornography via mainstream social media apps.
Channel 4 News followed up with a report on the impact pornography is having on sexual expectations in young people and, in particular, the physical and emotional safety of girls and young women.

I understand the instinct to bury one’s head in the sand, particularly for parents. To do so, however, is to ignore the facts – one in ten children has seen pornographic material by the age of nine. This rises to half by thirteen. At sixteen, it’s 81 per cent (and that’s a conservative estimate, some experts believe it’s as high as 97 per cent). The odds are, your child either has seen it or soon will. Ignoring that fact won’t make it untrue and, without the necessary context, it has the power to define their views about sex.

Jo Morgan, a Relationships & Sex Ed expert I work with, tells me that talking about the difference between fantasy and reality is essential. This doesn’t mean you have to go into specifics of sexual acts with your child until you both spontaneously combust from embarrassment. It could be as simple as pointing out that you wouldn’t watch Strictly a couple of times and then expect to be able to dance like the professionals. In the same way, porn acting is a job.

If you’re very brave/progressive, you can work on the basis that any inexperienced and sexually curious person with access to an entire internet will inevitably look for porn and instead direct them to ethnical sites. They prioritise consent, ensure the bodies are diverse and the orgasms are real. If that’s a bridge too far, work on creating a home or school environment where it is okay to say and hear “no”. It can be in relation to anything, just make sure the young people in your life know that it’s okay to have boundaries and that “no” is a full and definitive answer.

After the Channel 4 report, there was much (predictable) outrage from certain corners of the media, calling on the government to do more, as the much-watered-down Online Safety Bill is debated in the House of Lords.

Of course, I’m not suggesting the government shouldn’t intervene. Many of us believe there ought to be tighter sanctions on social media sites to regulate their content, whether that means reigning in the algorithms which push users towards misogynistic and racist content or going after work which encourages eating disorders and self-harm.

Yet the sad truth is that this type of content is profitable. Money talks. Young people are also incredibly tech savvy. It only takes one child to find a way around parental or in-app controls before potentially damaging content makes its way around their entire school. Young people tell me they were often first shown pornography in the playground by a boy (for it is usually boys) wanting to “gross them out” or shock them.

For both these reasons, changes in the law are not going to be enough. In fact, any of us who have a role in the lives of teenagers need to engage with this issue to make a difference. This is true especially of pornography. That means having some very difficult, very awkward conversations. The alternative, though, is worse.
Newsletter

Related Articles

Hong Kong News
Close
0:00
0:00
Don’t Dismiss China’s Peacemaking Bid
Austrian Parliament members walk out when Volodymyr Zelensky begins speaking.
Father obliterates council members following viral TikTok of biological male masturbating in women’s bathroom..
Tsai Ing-wen received a "warm welcome" from the Chinese people in the US.
EU's von der Leyen: "We know this is an era where we rely on one single supplier. China. 98% of our rare earth supply."
China and Brazil have signed a new deal that will allow them to trade in their own currencies, bypassing the US dollar as an intermediary
Elon Musk and Others Call for Pause on A.I., Citing ‘Profound Risks to Society’
“We've had evidence prior to the pandemic that masks were largely ineffective at preventing community transmission of influenza “
Former Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz:
Former Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz rejects being labeled a "billionaire"
Jamie Dimon is being deposed over JPMorgan Chase role in Epstein lawsuits
Brand new security footage has just been released to the public showing the Active shooter Audrey Elizabeth Hale drove to Covenant Church School in her Honda Fit this morning, parked, and shot her way into the building
Social Media censoring users for saying the true
Smart Iranian fashion designer teaching dummy TV anchors lesson about reality
AMERICA, 2023
U.S. charges FTX's Bankman-Fried with paying $40 million bribe
Fallen 'Crypto King' Who Owes Millions to Investors Was Kidnapped and Tortured
Regulators blame social media for SVB's rapid collapse: 'Complete game changer'
AOC explains why she opposes banning TikTok
Singapore’s Prime Minister says China and US need to stabilize relations because world can't afford a confict between the two superpowers
In a dramatic U-turn against His Government: Judicial Reform Legislation Must Be Halted, Says Israeli Defense Minister Yoav Gallant
Gordon Moore, a co-founder of Intel Corporation, died at 94
Powell: Silicon Valley Bank was an 'outlier'
Bordeaux town hall set on fire in France pro democracy protest
Police violence in Paris
Paris: Some of the police are stepping down and showing solidarity with the protesters.
Donald Trump arrested – Twitter goes wild with doctored pictures
NYPD is setting up barricades outside Manhattan Criminal Court ahead of Trump arrest.
Credit Suisse's Scandalous History Resulted in an Obvious Collapse - It's time for regulators who fail to do their job to be held accountable and serve as an example by being behind bars.
Goldman Sachs cuts outlook for European bank debt over Credit Suisse crisis
Paris Rioting vs Macron anti democratic law
'Sexual Fantasy' Assignment At US School Outrages Parents
The US government has charged Chinese businessman Guo Wengui with leading a $1 billion fraud scheme that cheated thousands of followers out of their money.
Credit Suisse to borrow $54 billion from Swiss central bank
The BBC problem about China
Russian Hackers Preparing New Cyber Assault Against Ukraine
"Will Fly Wherever International Law Allows": US Warns Russia After Drone Incident
If this was in Tehran, Moscow or Hong Kong
Announcing GPT-4
TRUMP: "Standing before you today, I am the only candidate who can make this promise: I will prevent World War III."
China is calling out the US, UK, and Australia on their submarine pact, claiming they are going further down a dangerous road
A brief banking situation report
We are witnessing widespread bank fails and the president just gave a 5 min speech then walked off camera.
Donald Trump's asked by Tucker Carlson question on if the U.S. should support regime change in Russia?.
'No relation to the American SVB': India's SVC Bank acts to calm depositors amid brand name confusion.
Good news: The U.S. government is now guaranteeing all deposits, held by, Silicon Valley Bank, and the funds are available as of today
Silicon Valley Bank exec was Lehman Brothers CFO
In a potential last-ditch effort, HSBC is considering a rescue deal to save Silicon Valley Bank UK from insolvency
Saudi Arabia has announced a major breakthrough in diplomacy with Iran after two years of intense talks
Elon Musk Is Planning To Build A Town In Texas For His Employees
×